Friday, November 14, 2008

Digging deeper

I've been getting into the Word daily, and seeking the Lord as well. My wife and I had sex last night and for some reason I find myself vulnerable today. I haven't felt the need to search for porn or masturbate or perform any other act that would seem sinful to the outside observer. The temptation is occuring in my heart......... I have an avid interest in tattoo's and bodybuilding, though my body would fool you, and this has led me to magazines/websites involving these subjects. What I find is that my eyes starts to wander or my mind runs away with these images and my desire to look further and to look at more grows. It's been said, "You can look, but you just can't touch!" But Jesus said, [paraphrased]"If you look at a woman with lust, you have committed adultry." That is the root of my struggle in recent time. The acting out has slowed to a crawl [though I am not completely immune], and the attitude of my heart is being revealed to me more and more. This brings up questions that I don't know the answer to.....or do I? Do I put aside my interest in tattoos, simply because the world attaches sex, fetishes, rebellion, and deeply erotic themes with this art? When you look at magazines, websites, etc, it is a hard thing to get away from. What about bodybuilding? It is a healthy thing, but in the hands of the world it gets twisted and turns to obsession of body image, sexual displays, and quite near to porn. Do I have to give up tattoos and bodybuilding? Or do I have to find a safe place to examine my interests so that I am not put into a place of temptation? I know the answer, but do I want to take the right steps?

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