Week 1 is complete and I'm headed back to Becoming Whole tonight. It was a successful week, but my thoughts and temptations gained strength as the week went on, and I'm ready to be renewed for this weeks battle. Yesterday at church, the Lord spoke into my broken spots, and the pastor spoke on 'Developing a Godly Self Image'. The shame and disappointment that my pornography addiction and masturbation have brought upon me often brings me to a place of...I wouldn't call it self-hatred, but I certainly haven't liked myself very much. This dislike of myself cycles with my addiction and reveals itself through my inner thoughts and bouts of semi-depression. It is hard to love others, grow in your relationship with your Lord, be a good father and husband, all while you don't even like yourself. I ordered the CD and will share some points from his sermon when I get a chance to review it, but I must say that it spoke into the deep parts of my brokenness.
11In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. 12Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. 13Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness. 14For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.
The French Lesson - My first desert experience occurred shortly after I became a Christian. Having moved back to my parent’s home from the gay ghetto of Long Beach, I grew bor...
6 years ago